Burning Insects

I was worried. Our next door neighbor had passed away and I was nervous about how the boys would handle it all. Would the boys be frightened and traumatized seeing our neighbor lying in a casket? I didn't know. The training that I have been receiving at school made me even more sensitive to the possible effects on our children.

I was at a conference and Jason attended the wake with the boys. "Is he breathing?" Karsten asked tentatively as he peered into the casket. "No, he's in a better place," Zachary replied, demonstrating more understanding than I had given him credit for. Relieved that the boys were able to handle life's more difficult moments, I was prepared to take the boys with us to the funeral.

As we sat through the funeral, the boys were fidgety and not paying much attention to what was happening. As if they were in their own little bubble, the tears and eulogies didn't seem to impact them. But as the casket was pushed down the aisle and out the church, the priest followed with incense burning. The smoke wafted towards us and Karsten immediately piped up, "Peeww! What is that?" I leaned down and whispered, "They're burning incense." Apparently shocked, Karsten looked wide-eyed and asked, "They're burning insects? What kind?"

Even as I corrected his misunderstanding, I realized something. I always worry about the bigger, deeper issues. My kids continually demonstrate that it's really the small things that really matter to them. I was worried about them viewing a dead body. They were more concerned that the priest was burning insects.